Weekly recap(s) (9/19-10/2): Hanging on


I really hate running right now. It's miserable and I feel like garbage every time I run. And it's so depressing. 

Let me be clear, I don't really hate running. I just hate running right now. A few weeks ago I had one of the worst asthma attacks of my life during a race (and logged a super crappalicious time), then a few days later, I got sicker than I've been in a long time and couldn't move from the couch.

weekly workouts september 19 through october 2

During the past two weeks, I've been 1) recovering/regaining strength from that mess, 2) dealing with a weird congestion thing where I'm stuffed up and coughing phlegm, and 3) worried about and busy with Meadow Beagle as she has been going through radiation treatments (she's halfway through now and doing well, so that's a bright spot). And I don't feel like my lungs fully recovered from that asthma attack and the wheezing has been worse and worse. 

Meadow Beagle is happy to be home

Meadow Beagle is happy to be home

All of this on top of my already more than a year-long terrible run/race streak resulting from ongoing allergy, sinus, and asthma issues (for which I've postponed treatment until Meadow is done with hers since it would just be too much going on and too much driving here, there and everywhere at the same time) and the life stress of the first half of 2016. 

STOP THE RIDE. I want to get off. 

Workout summary (9/19-9/25)

  • Monday: Off
  • Tuesday: Easy run - 3.02 miles (8:59 pace)
  • Wednesday: Off
  • Thursday:
    • AM: Run - 5.01 miles (8:58 pace)
    • PM: Barre
  • Friday: Barre
  • Saturday: Off
  • Sunday: Long run - 8 miles (no watch)


Running miles: 16.03 miles
Total runs: 3
Barre/strength: 2
Total workouts: 5

Workout summary (9/26-10/2)

  • Monday: Off
  • Tuesday: Off
  • Wednesday: Barre 
  • Thursday: Barre
  • Friday: Easy run - 3.11 miles (8:25 pace; splits - 8:58, 8:40, 7:44)
  • Saturday: Easy run - 7.01 miles, sucking wind/ashtma was awful (9:16 pace)
  • Sunday: Long run - 9.01 miles (8:55 pace)


Running miles: 19.13 miles
Total runs: 3
Barre/strength: 2
Total workouts: 5

Which brings me to why I hate running right now. I'm so effing tired. I'm mentally tired, I'm emotionally tired, and my goddamn legs are tired when I haven't even logged very many miles on them at all lately.  

It's not that running is hard for me right now like it is when you haven't run for a while or when you're a brand new runner. It's that I just feel like garbage when I run - my asthma is a mess, which just sets off all kinds of awfulness since my body isn't getting enough oxygen. Then I feel tired all over and just want to take a nap anywhere, any time. And who really wants to feel like that ever, let alone intentionally inflicting it upon herself by going for a run? My motivation has completely left the building.  

But as always, I'm hanging on. My mileage is still embarrassingly low and my workouts are sporadic and inconsistent, but at least I'm out there, slogging through. 

I've had some okay runs this week - Friday was a nice 3 mile, progressive run with decent splits (8:58, 8:40, 7:44), even though my asthma was annoying in the first half. But Saturday's 7-miler was a nightmare. I was a wheezing mess and just couldn't get it together. When I was still wheezing hours later, even after using my nebulizer, I went to the doctor and got prednisone. I was really hoping to avoid that, but since it's been several weeks and I haven't been able to get it under control with my normal meds, I had to do it. 

Sunday's run was a bit better and I got to run at sunset, which is my favorite time to run. the run wasn't great, but at least I wasn't wheezing the entire time. My lungs were still tight, but in a few days I think I should be back to normal (whatever that is). 

SUnset running is the best!

SUnset running is the best!

And fall is coming and the humidity will decrease a little (at least it might, but we never can be sure here in the South) and I have races that I'm signed up for and paid to run. So I'm going to freaking run. I'm going to run until it doesn't suck any more. And I'm going to continue to hang on to the hope that someday the work I've put in will pay off and that I'll be able to work harder more consistently, and I'll actually see some positive results. 

In other news...

I'm linking up with HoHoRuns and MissSippi Piddlin'  for their Weekly Wrap post. You can check out all of this week's posts here.